That Time of Year

The Search for Soul begins...

It is the time of year for the big ..."what'scomingnextIhavewastedmylifetwentyeighteenwillbebetterIcouldnotaskformoremylifeisbrilliantwheredidIgowrong" examination of life conversation...

I've chosen my "word" for 2018 and it is Soul.  I saw a quote recently and it said "Where ever you are, be the soul of that place" and that struck me as a sign.  Soul is something that I believe in, and there are very few of those things left after the past year. 
I think we all have a Soul, and that we are here in this precious life to share ours with those who are worthy.  I think the trick is figuring out who isn't worthy, and that doesn't happen until we've already shared, so we always learn the hard way.  Pessimistic?  Not necessarily.

I have spent eleven months realigning my life and it has been a struggle. 
I have gained many things, the greatest of which is perspective about the past and how it shapes the future, all while I was learning to live in the present.  Pretty existential, I'll admit.

Someone I respect asked me the other day, "why don't you write?". 
I had now answer.

When I do "write" I am attempting to convey the many thoughts, musings, ideas that swirl in my mind, and that is where my Soul resides.  My Soul can be found in the fleeting thoughts that are smart enough to realize that everything is really that very moment. It happens to me when I am working at my part time job, doing repetitive tasks, and thinking creative thoughts.  It happens to me when I am driving and listening to music, or sitting in car line, waiting for Rosey, knowing that these precious years are drawing to a close, and there will be a day when I have no place to be at 3:00 p.m.
It happens to me a lot, since I came up for air in January.
I feel more calm, and maybe I have discerned what I should spend my time thinking about.  Maybe I have gotten deeper in my work toward living my best life and perhaps, I've  connected with something that will lead me forward toward a Soul Filled Life, of which I feel I'm on the fringe.  I'm not sure. 

This is all to say that "Soul" jumped out at me, and I hope, in the year ahead, my journey will make the reason for that clear to me, and to those who glance at this blog. 

What is your word?